Shock and grief

It sinks in. The loss of one child, the birth of mother. I mourn my sweet son, welcome a daughter. Hold on to that perspective, my mind says as it fluctuates among stigma, freakiness, acceptance, the possibility that my child might know some real happiness for the first time in his life. This truth abides: he has never been able to hold onto joy. It has always crumbled and fallen through his hands like dried leaves

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